Give Those Back!

Teacher passes back tests to period 1

Student: Um...Teacher, this is period 5's scantrons.

Teacher: What are you doing!?! Give those back! How dare you take these!

According to my Calculations, It Belongs to Mom

Teacher finds a calculator on a lab table and doesn't know who it belongs to.

Teacher: For future reference, you guys might want to put your name on your calculators from now on.

Boy: My calculator has my mom's name on it! :D

How Long Will you Last?

Class discusses the CAHSEE a week before testing.

Student 1: What if we aren't done by fourth period?

Teacher: We're having a study period. And besides, you're not going to take 4 or 5 periods taking the CAHSEE...

- - - - -

1st Day of the CAHSEE English (modified day)

Teacher: -takes attendance- Where's Student 1?

Student 2: Still taking the CAHSEE.

Teacher: You're kidding me... - shocked smile-

Student 1 comes in a few minutes after class starts.

Student 1: I couldn't take it anymore... I was soooo bored!

Hilarious.

Student 1: So I have to do this project on Ghandi..

(With all seriousness:)

Student 2: Wait, is Ghandi a sophmore?

Student 1: Ya, he is, and Jesus graduated last year.

sticks??

Teacher: ...for you to understand this concept, let me give an example using the game pick up stix. Now how many are familiar with that game?

Student: What do you use to play the game?

Class along with teacher: STICKS!!

Take the Easy Way Out

Spanish class is practicing using their commands and sense of directions in their textbook.

Teacher: In this activity, we're using a subway map of Mexico City to practice how to get from one place to another. Student, please tell us how to get from Chapultepec Park to Zocalo.

Student: From Chapultepec Park, you take Line 1 and go towards Pino Suarez. Get off there and take...uh... -stares at the book for a few minutes in silence-

Teacher: ...takes...?

Student: Oh my god...why can't you just drive?

Odd Appetite

Student 1: I like to eat rocks.

Student 2: You're weird.